s u n n y s i d e u p.

  

Inspite of regular check-ups at the vet, Mana fell ill. The first time we took him to the vet for that particular illness, he was warded for a few days after an operation. Then we brought him home. and was told by the vet hat he would be ok.

Then after a few months, clearly he was down again. WE sent him for tests, x-ray, and was told again that he needed to be warded. By now he was very ill – not even eating well. We took him to the Animal Infirmary at Jalan Ipoh where he was warded for observation and treatment.

My family didn’t feel too good about it. Dr Siva was very caring. We have known him because of Mana for almost 12 years. He promised to do the best. All of us went back with a heavy heart. When we left him, Mana was too weak to protest.

The following day and everyday we received reports from the Infirmary. I cannot even begin to explain the sufferings of Mana.

Thus for the next 5 nights, I would go to the Infirmary to be with Mana. I would sit out side his cage, fed him, rub him and just to talk to him (Writing this is really hurting me and am still fighting back the tears.) he would only eat when I put his food on my palm. It hurts me so much because as much as he wanted to communicate with me—but he did not have the strength and voice...

My lunch hours were also spent with Mana every day. Something tells me that those days would be the days I had always feared. The passing on of Mana.

For five nights, I would be with him from 7.45pm to 9.45pm – and everytime I had to leave him, I had to tear myself from hugging Mana and carry him home. I was torn to pieces everytime I see him looking at me, just like the first time he looked at me in the kitchen when he was young and very sick, begging me to take him home. It was almost like he knew his time was near. And to this date I still regret for not bringing him home –where he belonged.

Every morning I would call Dr Siva to have his report. Two days before Mana passed on; DR Siva told me that Mana was improving. I couldn’t believe it. I was the happiest man. That night I spent my happiest time with him. He was standing and actually mewed and talking to me. He was kissing and licking my face. Only God knows my joy.

All this was short-lived as the next day, Dr Siva told me he has weakened again. I was shattered. The last night I spent with him will forever remain in my memory with love and regret. Love for my companion and regret for not taking him home to spend his last few hours with his family. When I tried to leave him, he was trying his level best to get up—and fell in his cage. I came back and sat with him again. Believed it or not I tried to leave him 3 times and I came back again each time. All that took nearly one hour. I do not know if I was imagining it , but I knew he was crying ( as I am right now – but I will continue as I always wanted to put this in writing.).

I drove home that night fighting back the tears—half knowing that that was the probably the last I would see Mana alive.

The next day, at about 3.00 pm, I was teaching in my class when my phone rang. It was Dr Siva. I knew then. All I heard was ‘I am sorry…” and I just sat down and tears just flowed ---in front of my students.

I had to leave to be with my Mana – and I did. When I arrived at the hospital Dr Siva offered his condolence , saying “ WE did everything we could. But he went painlessly.”

I saw him on the table. Lifeless. Mana. That moment all my time with him flashed through my mind.

It was raining very heavily. I drove home to fetch my family , went back to the hospital to bring Mana home. It was already 8.00pm then. We put him on his favourite table and covered him with his favourite batik. The family was in tears.

Next day, all of us took him to the garden of my sister’s house and buried Mana with the greatest of respect and love. I know my son was consoling me as I was sobbing away uncontrollably. And was my son. So was my wife. So were my daughters.

We went home and suddenly the house is empty. Although he was in hospital the last five nights, it was only at that time that I realised I will not have Mana to wake me up, send me off to work, remind me of my bed-time and many oher habits which still haunt me.

I have indeed lost a companion I dearly loved and still do.